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Yes, we have become doggie ventriloquists. This insane behavior crept into our lives with the first puppy. "Did Earnest have a good day?" my husband asked at the door. Some sort of madness crept over me - a question needs a reply - the dog can’t talk - it’s up to me... "Oh yes, I went potty in the yard and played with my squeaky toys and napped". It didn’t seem odd. Conversations with the canines became routine. First it was "Yes Mama, I’m repentant", "No, Mama it wasn’t me" "But, look at how cute I am" Now the little beasts editorialize all day. "Did you mark that wall?" "Oh no, Mama, it was Arthur. I am far too dignified to do something like that." After 14 years of having us speak for them they won’t shut up. "I don’t want the stinkin’ kibble. I want canned!" It seems natural enough. No one is harmed. Then non-dog people come to call. Their faces show a mixture of concern and terror. Our families smile uneasily. We endure the stares. After all, it is a peculiar madness. We’re not sensitive. I just hope the dogs can keep their mouths shut about the whole thing.
Relax dogmama, my dog says this is perfectly normal.
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Heavens,dogmama! Seek help at once!
